Call to Post
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Today, we began the Christmas Fast. Although it actually begins on November 15, today is a Friday fast, making the Christmas Fast begin today for all practical purposes.
And I am so not ready.
As Joel mentioned recently, I have been facing a rough battle of late in the spiritual warfare. I will not give you specifics, but it comes down to the disjunction between trust and despair. Are God’s instructions for the human machine the best that I can do? Or is there goodness to be found in my passions? It’s the same old question our ancestors faced. The same serpent keeps sowing the same seeds of distrust — and I believe the lie, just like my ancestors.
In the midst of my struggle, I laid aside my daily prayers. I was weary and distracted, and frankly, I did not want to talk to God. This was not a coincidence. These past two weeks feel like a very directed onslaught against me. Not that I’m special, but I feel like Batman in the KnightFall series — I have had every one of my enemies thrown against me, and now I don’t have the strength to fight back. I’ll have a broken back soon. And now the fast begins. I am so not ready.
I am so not ready.
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2 Responses to “Call to Post”
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November 14th, 2003 at 10:23 pm
You’re not alone. The last couple of weeks have been pretty tough for me. And I’ve heard similiar stories of increased struggle, temptation, and warfare from others.
November 15th, 2003 at 6:18 pm
Hmmmm, common themes.
I wonder what’s up?
As a side note though . . . you need a Robin man! Or at the very least . . . a psychotic young man, whose father brainwashed him since his early childhood, to fill in for you . . . or . . . wait . . .
Just remember . . . nightvision can be a detriment if used incorrectly. 🙂